first off, i think blood-donating stories are the best. something interesting always happens.

heh heh.

secondly, in all my self-inflicted controversy, i feel God has shown me answers. which is amazing. but what isnt amazing with Him.

and now, this song. THIS SONG. in my confusion over Christmas break, Lifehouse brought me so much comfort. and right now.

This doubt is screaming in my face
in this familiar place,
sheltered and concealed
and if this night won't let me rest
don't let me second guess
what i know to be real put away
all i know for tonight and maybe i just might learn
to let it go take my security from me
and maybe finally i won't have to know everything
i am falling into grace to the unknown to where you are
and faith makes everybody scared it's the unknown,
the don't-know that keeps me hanging on
to you i got nothing left to defend
i cannot pretend that everything makes sense
but does it really matter now if i do not know how
to figure this thing out
i am against myself again trying to fit
these pieces in walking on a cloud of dust to get to you

"unknown" Lifehouse

i think....my eyes are going to fall out of my head.

i spent most of my afternoon poring over my Teaching in American Society book, searching for the answers to the enormous study guide that i received on wednesday. i've spent so much more time on that stupid packet than i have worthwhile time in class. and i'm only halfway done. bah...

my sister came here for this weekend, it was lots of fun. we went shopping, and that was great. and a lot of eating at restaurants. as my dad put it, it was either "feast or famine"

and now, six hours later, i'm starting to feel hungry.

alright, so i bet you are wondering what i did that constitiutes as "not most of the afternoon" and thats listening to more obscure music. it's kind of addicting. anyway, Bear vs. Shark is pretty good, even though they are a bit hard rocking than i usually listen to. but thats ok, fun guitar in "Ma Jolie"

how do you abbreviate "versus?" it bugs me when people put "v" but it bugs me even more when people actually say "v", as in "Bear V Shark." no no no, thats not how it goes. i'm a "vs" person, "articulating versus."

whatever.

i've got some tori amos on now. its kind of my mood right now. remember when we watched her dvd, Ilana? that was cool.

so...how about all that love thats supposed to be all around?

the past five hours have been really strange.

ow. it hurts.

happy, happy valentine's day...

i've been entertaining my thoughts recently.

field experience starts today. leaving in less than an hour!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Sing me something soft,
Sad and delicate,
Or loud and out of key,
SING ME ANYTHING.

-straylight run

"this moment is you"

so, i'm listening to matt wertz again, reminding myself once again how wonderful he is.

i really should have done more homework tonite. but i think i'm going to go to the library for a little bit tomorrow. that way i wont be in an unproductive mood.

i suggested watching Drop Dead Gorgeous to my friends tonite, so we did. i just love how it should be so serious, but its not. and afterwards i had this strange urge to say things such as "doncha know" and other minnesotian phrases with accents. made me delightfully feel at home.

i honestly do not know where this week went. and i thought last week went fast. i hope next week goes fast though, waaay too much stuff going on. and i think monday i've booked myself clean from 9-5, with an hour or so for lunch.

but, i wont go on and on about that.

did some music research tonite, on Eisley and Teitur. I'm still trying to decide if i like the former, and knowing i love the latter, find out more.

earlier, while i was "resting" and not "napping," i started to feel a vibration. like, the whole room was shaking. after i removed my headphones, i could tell it was...a bass. turned WAAAY up. this was 4:30 pm on a friday afternoon, when every college student should be napping, and someone had the bass turned way up on their crummy music.
went away to dinner, then came back to watch movies, and it wasnt there then. afterwards, it was. and about 12:30, it was louder and i could hear people this time.
i wonder if it still going...

woo! it stopped! for now

im not really complaining, i just thought the whole room vibrating was kinda annoying. but the guys who live above me scream a lot on a normal basis. i kind of want to meet these maniacs. but not really.

i did dishes twice today. TWICE.

can you tell i'm blogging for blogging's sake? this is what happens when i am sick of homework.
so i think i'll go to bed now. just cuz i'm tired.

listen to music, and sing with your eyes closed

i dont think i can put together a whole post, as i have put my flowing writing abilities into my seminar paper. so here are all the random thoughts that are flowy floating around in my head.

-i STILL heart Gratitude

-i'm trying to not obsessively check away messages

-my seminar paper, more than 900 words, is able to fit on one page. (with size nine font, of course)

-i think i want vanilla wafers for my birthday. they are just that good.

-today my political science professor said something to the effect of "i don't have any children. and if you were to know my wife, you would know that some people are not cut out to be parents."

-its supposed to snow tonite. pluh, like that will happen.

-i got a friend request from a guy on facebook, and i dont even know who he is. so i sent him a message, cuz maybe my mind blanked and i didnt remember meeting him. then i get a message back saying he just saw me on facebook and maybe we could talk sometime. in short, i Rejected someone for the first time on facebook today. now maybe i can join the group on facebook thats called "i rejected someone on facebook!"

-it was mardi gras tonite in the geisert cafeteria. i had Louisianna chicken and a cinnamon roll with yellow sprinkles. festive, i know.

-"Love is in the air!..."
"...and i'm not breathing!"

well, in a twist of luck, i'm listening to "every new day" by five iron frenzy. tomorrow morning is a new day. for you too. make it fantastic, because you can.

i really shouldn't be here.

i am desperate for...something.

i am going to monicas in an hour, and i haven't packed. and i have gotten an embarrassing small amount of homework finished today. case in point: the keyboard is atop my western civ paper.

and it was going so well...

i just keep listening to my music, and wanting to listen to more. i just want to sit here and listen and listen and listen. then i turn it off to do homework and i neeeeeeed to hear a song, its way too quiet. then i cant concentrate when the music is on.
favorites of the past hour and a half have been david gray and holy freaking Gratitude.
soooo amazing.

spent time outside today, while i should have been doing homework. went on a walk to look for meg's prospective apartment next year, but we couldnt find it anyway, then michelle and i went for a run. 18 minutes!! we were impressed with ourselves.
for the record, it was about 55 degrees today. i wore a light jacket (hehe, yes alex, there is a difference)

i think for my sanity, it was good i got out.

we'll have to see how all the homework pans out over the next few days

saw ladder 49 last nite... really good. good soundtrack too (with david gray!!)

went on a napoleon dynamite craze yesterday, as found hilarious soundboard thanks to mandy's profile. then i had too much fun calling my sister. then got movie soundtrack from alex, and sent the SuitWalk track to various people, cracking them all up...(or at least i was laughing)
personally one of my favorite tracks. ooh and i also like "do the chickens have large talons?" HAHAHA

speaking of favorite tracks, i am falling more and more in love with Gratitude each listen. i'm getting to know some of the other songs better, like "all in a row" which chris described as "such a perfect song," and "someone to love" is...gahhhhhh its amazing.

gaahhhhhhh

and we know that it wont last...but we're fortunate, fortunate. and the time just proves too much, and we're wearing down, wearing down again. --who else?

currently listening to...CCR! "bad moon rising," in which everyone thinks its "theres a bathroom on the right." unless you dont, because then you're not cool.

so, i'm a liar. i put my away message up that said that i was doing my civ homework, which i honestly was going to, and then that did not happen. blame facebook.
i wish people would stop sending me facebook chain messages.

cleaned my desk today. it was pretty bad.

its like, 45 degrees outside. i opened my window. feels like spring.

maybe i do need an attitude adjustment.

did you know "heard it through the grapevine" by CCR is 11 minutes and six seconds? and its not even that good of a song.

ok, so now i'm onto some murder by death. i think its good i check out all this music that i've accumulated in the past week.

which reminds me, Gratitude album finally made it to my computer. **lots an' lots of joy**

some of these long songs i have been listening to haven't been long enough.

i couldnt sleep last nite so i got up and my roommate asked me what was wrong.
i wonder if i looked miserable, frustrated, or what. i was just tired.
or am i frustrated with something?

i had Bosco sticks for the first time today. they were pretty good.

geology was better today, there were actually notes that i could take down in my notebook. poly sci was as usual some sort of "discussion," but i was inspired to lay out topics for the paragraphs of my western civ paper. deftly a productive hour. and math for teachers is getting better, i was faced with algebra and i could actually do it the visual way that she wanted us to do without just doing formulas.

and if that doesn't make any sense, oh well.

hooray for Gratitude and getting the album a month early and facebook. err, now if i could only get it...