um, thanksgiving break is already over.

i had a good time, and of course it was great to see everyone that i did. it did go really fast though.

i have a lot of stuff to do for classes, and i fear i won't get it all done. i think i will, like i usually do, but it is still a bit daunting.

but i'm not freaking out about it. quite the contrary, actually. i feel like i have this calm over me. a feeling of great contentment, and a sense that God's got a hold of my problems. of course i've got issues, but i have this assurance that everything is going to be okay.

and i'm enjoying it, because, unfortunately, this doesn't happen as much as i wish it did.

therefore, i am listening to Audio Adrenaline's "It is Well With my Soul" and David Crowder's "Stars" (which is an amazing song and you all should hear it -- all of the words and melody and rhyme and imagery all just fall perfectly into place)

on a side note, i have gotten my hair cut. its a bit more drastic than i anticipated, but whatever, its something different. and i've had more people say "i like your hair!" than "you cut your hair!" so, i think thats a good thing.

a few more spins of some songs, a lil bit of Human Development homework, then time for bed.

do you think posting will make me do my homework? perhaps.

anyway, talk about a weekend! i love being in college.

i'm still recovering from that insanity last weekend. but sleeping til ten two days in a row certainly helps.

i do have a lot of homework this weekend, but i've got a "no sweat!" attitude about it!

it struck me the other day, finally, that i can go home soon! its been awhile, and i'm looking forward to it. its been nearly a month since i've seen my family!

i've been listening to Sigur Rós quite a lot lately, and i saw the video for Glósóli, which was amazing. mmmm soo good....i'm so glad i bought the cd.

played volleyball with Brittany this afternoon, it was fun! passing back and forth with a fellow volleyball player has been greatly missed.

to my friends from home, SEE YOU SOON!! ;-D

mmm...wednesdays.

I ONLY HAVE ONE MORE LEFT OF THE SEMESTER!

today could have been an awful day. i didn't want to get up, it was cold, i forgot my cell phone, it was hot in the library, tutoring was intense, they had no grilled chicken at blimpies, all my classes went mostly the whole length, i missed a meeting.

lets take a look at this.
i didn't want to get up. i did get up, and got a Starbucks Frappacino, and left for class at 8:58, but i followed my professor into the building. oh, and i STILL saw jake on the way to class, hahaha, oh it never fails.
it was cold. it sure was windy. but mmm for hot chocolate, and in all reality, not being THAT cold.
i forgot my cell phone. um, not big deal.
it was hot in the library. took my sweatshirt off. and it was warm and cozy and i listened to relient k while studying.
tutoring was intense. but after beating that problem to death she GOT IT!!!! it was amazing.
they had no grilled chicken at blimpies. well, that was kind of sucky. i'm sure it will be extra delicious next time.
all my classes went mostly the whole length. BUT i got three quizzes out of the way, and in my other evening class we had a speaker about Autism and Special Education and Inclusion. my goodness, i was a bit frightened with how entralled i was.
i missed a meeting. oh...oops. thats what i get for not writing stuff down. but apparently a lot of other people missed the meeting. i'm really glad i haven't forgotten any tutoring meetings though.

AND my tutee cancelled tomorrow morning, so i can sleep in until eleven if i wanted to. but i've been so busy i've been avoiding the gym, so maybe i should hit that up. plus i'm shopping for Cru with Carly; we have no idea what we are going to buy, but...

hmmm...that relient k this morning sounded UHmazing. especially "Sadie Hawkins Dance," JEEZ i hadn't heard that song in a really long time. relient k is good study music, and if you are surprised by that, consider this; its got this driving force in it, it doesnt mingle around, distracting me from what i should be doing, its pushing me, narrowing my focus right down to that...frickin...homework...

but wow, i can actually breathe now. i was dying by Sunday night. somehow that paper got done for tuesday, and somehow my lesson plan got all worked out and my teacher said it was actually pretty ok, and somehow i got my advancement application turned in.

oh, by the way, i've spent an awful lot of time looking at Questionable Content during "regain sanity" sessions. in that i've been reading that webcomic...duh...

so, i've got phrases like "aerodynamically curvacious" goin' through my brain...ahahaha, good stuff! well, anyway, i'm on strip 265. as of today, they have 493. so i still have a ways to go.

time to do some stuff! love love love...
bye for now

i was going to post this picture last night, but i wanted it to seem like i was doing homework.
right...exactly like i'm not right now.


anyway, that is the forcast for my hometown. looks pretty, doesn't it? my sister is hoping for a snow day.

i've realized the lack of insight i've had here, in like, forever. i guess i dump all my genius into my homework. er, ok.

well if that is the case my genius is depleted as of right now, as I can't think of anything to say for my diversity paper. i guess it would help if i fully understood what i should be writing.

hahaha

but really, its not THAT bad. i have to talk about a gender sensitive framework in the classroom. and honestly, i wanted to start this paper last Wednesday. it just didn't happen, somehow -- i had stuff to do like meetings and lesson plans and application essays and symphonies. even the ridiculous amount of time i spent in the library could not eleviate the load.

i took extra special precautions to get this paper done. i even signed off AIM. now isn't that discipline?

i hear you snickering. i'm updating my blog, you say. thats because i need a reburst of creative juices. whatever that means.

on a plus side, my tutoring hours have been picking up at warp speed. its kind of fun, i hope that i am of help to my tutees. and none of them need my help in calculus, hoorah! as of scheduled at this point, i'll have at least three and a half hours for my next paycheck. exceptional.

hmm...what else. i've been listening to Jars of Clay while doing this paper, and i've enjoyed it more than i thought i would. also, i go home in just eight days.

likesomeonelselikeyoume.

we were learning about depression in psychology today. it makes me think about things i'd rather forget.

i am still missing summer.

WHO'S YOUR MOM!

oh, i love it :-)

well i guess i had better get back to this paper. boys and girls...are equal! and culture has lots to do with it! and i...am hopefully not stuck!! anymore!!

woo woo! i've got november's mixtape!

"November Rocks"
I'm Still Here - Johnny Rzeznik
Cash Machine - Hard-Fi
Like Eating Glass - Bloc Party
Just For You - William Tell
Cowbell - Tapes 'n Tapes
Praise You In This Storm - Casting Crowns
Kissing the Lipless - The Shins
Magnetic North - Rane
Hash Pipe - Weezer
Red, Red, Red - Fiona Apple
Shy That Way - Jason Mraz/Tristan Prettyman
So Here We Are - Bloc Party
Men of Station - 13 & God
Marching Bands of Manhattan - Death Cab for Cutie
Over My Head (Cable Car) - The Fray
Sorry or Please - Kings of Convenience
Close to Me - The Cure
Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield
Bog People - Xiu Xiu
Ghosts - Ted Leo & Pharmacists

notice the first song...i'm in love all over again. i did a ton of homework today and i'm about to do more. but now i have my fresh playlist and i'm set to go.

i miss summer.

i was having avantis with carly today and i started talking about my summer job, and how i was bitten, i learned takedowns, and played with kids with autism.

i think this is a culmination of starting my new tutoring job, looking for a job, my sickness of doing homework, the end of my observation, talking to katie and kelli, and the Sugar Ray music i'm listening to. but seriously.

it seems like its been too long since i was just out somewhere helping people out. dealing with spontenaity. doing something with the solitary intent of helping the kids have a good time. learning in the midst of craziness.

but i do love my new tutoring job. my tutee is an adorable seven year old, and makes me feel home again. i miss that immersion though, constantly thinking about CAMP!

ok, i'm not obsessed, honestly. but as hard as it was, it was ironically simple, in that i just did what had to be done; there were no ways around it. and dammit, it was fun.

i've just got to stay true to myself.

Do you remember
The summers that lasted so long
June til September
Was our time to sing all the songs
Do you remember
All of us together

hmm...well look at this, it's wednesday night. one of my most desired places to be.

this week has been so slow, and i can't believe that i was miserably sick last week. that was last week, right?

now my focus is job apps and advancement application and papers due next week.

agh, sometimes i wish i could see how other people view me. what if i'm being ignorant and i don't even know it?

i need to go work out.

i was bored, so i decided to post.

then i realized i didn't really have anything to say.

:-)

yeah, i'm having a hard time focusing on studying for my midterm tomorrow. even though its been lessened to a "quiz." theres still a tenative fair amount of information i should know.

blah.

so, at the request of about seven people, i went to health services on Monday. no, kelli, they didn't give me a pregnancy test. rather the doctor listened to my back with a stethescope for five times as long as doctors usually do, and i coughed and wheezed my way through deep breaths. when i expect the "oh you'll be fine" he sits back and says "you have this condition called 'walking pneumonia'". oh, ok.
i'm instructed i need to go get some pills and i'll feel better by the end of the week.
so, i got the red pills and i take one a day, and i feel as if i were to move too fast i'll puke. its also a nice excuse to take a nap, and not study for said midterm. its also nice to not have a modified man-like voice. but still sucks that i have a ferocious cough, and people are unfortunate to be around me when i do so.

aside from that, i think things are ok. i'm trying to take things pretty easy. i also heard the question....What if I have everything i need, right now? Imagine that, having everything I need...not searching for something else to make myself complete...
I know that God is all i need, aside from a few good people in my life, as I am human myself. which I have.
i'm gonna work on that.

anyway, i thought you would enjoy some pictures from this weekend.
this is a picture of us girls at the pumpkin patch/apple orchard.





and the truck/float, which i got to drive! seriously, one of the coolest experiences of my life.